http://singilu.livejournal.com/ (
singilu.livejournal.com) wrote in
writetomyheart2015-03-08 11:31 pm
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[Team Five] Don't look (away)
So uhm I wanted to post this in its entirety, but then I made some last minute real life commitments and only managed to write a part of it. It's ... very something. Anyway, inspired by this prompt. I am sorry. Next time I'll do better?
"You suck at this game so much, hyung," Jongin says, snorting in laughter and disappearing from the tiny Skype window in the corner of Chanyeol's screen, probably slipping from the edge of his chair where he's been siting for the past half an hour trying to built a shelter to hide from all the zombies.. He appears a little later, slightly pink and flustered.
Chanyeol blinks and doesn't deny the accusation. "But you love me anyway," he says, trying to sound as blasé as possible.
"Yeah, sure, hyung," Jongin says, his eyes back on the game. "I should go," he adds and Chanyeol sees him logging out of the game. "It's gotten kind of late."
Chanyeol nods dumbly, maximizing the Skype window so he has a screen full of sleepy Jongin, eyes droopy, hair a floppy mess. Jongin waves in goodbye.
"Bye," Chanyeol says weakly. The moment Jongin's gone he sighs, sinking deeper into his armchair, and stares blankly at the finished Skype call.
Chanyeol doesn't like Mine Craft all that much. He supposes it's okay, but he's never got addicted. He only plays online with Jongin because the other has mentioned it once, how he wants to try playing with a partner but doesn't want to do it with some stranger, and Chanyeol just kind of ... volunteered. Most of the time he's useless, only following Jongin's directions and failing spectacularly at it. Jongin just groans and laughs at him and calls him dumb.
The best part about the nights spent gaming instead of studying and sleeping is when Jongin calls on Skype and leaves the camera on. Chanyeol spends most of those nights watching Jongin instead of following the game, getting into trouble with Jongin even more. When gaming like this, Jongin forgets that he thinks his own laugh is dumb and never stops himself when he laughs too loud and with his whole body, like this Jongin flails and explains, excited about what they're going to build next and how many things they have to dig out or create, and then he segues into what he wants to do in real life when he manages to break his vicious circle of part time job, dance practices with his team, sleep and Mine Craft. Like this, Chanyeol gets to watch without care because Jongin isn't paying attention to him, building castles in the skies or in the pixelated world of the game.
It always leaves Chanyeol a little empty when Jongin logs out carelessly and instead of freshly showered Jongin in his lose tank top, there's a reality of Chanyeol's empty room and an uncomfortable simmer of longing in his gut. Chanyeol clicks around with his mouse and ends up in his e-mail inbox, staring at the link Baekhyun sent him about a week ago. Baekhyun's such an ass. That day he's found Chanyeol playing online with Jongin again, sitting in their living room. He sighed and let Chanyeol to it, but once they finished for the night, he came back, sitting next to Chanyeol and giving him the most disgusted look ever.
"You're the most pitiful person I know. It's off putting," he said. Chanyeol dropped his head on top of his closed lap top. "Tell me again why you're spending your best years playing a game you don't even like with Jongin who doesn't even notice you when you could be out there partying and getting some?"
Chanyeol groaned. They've been over this a million times. It's not even the first time Baekhyun's used his psychotherapist voice on him. Chanyeol honestly didn't know who on earth would want to go to therapy with Byun Baekhyun and would pay for it, but they were in their last year of college and Baekhyun was convinced he'd once have a successful practice in the area.
"I mean, Chanyeol. Believe it or not, but there are people out there who'd gladly have sex with you. When you don't move too much, you're kind of attractive. There might even be someone out there willing to have a normal relationship with you."
"I don't care," Chanyeol said. Baekhyun knew this too. He turned his head and looked at Baekhyun from his spot on his overheated laptop, and Baekhyun sighed.
"Granted, they might not have an ass as fine as that of Kim Jongin, but--" he yelped when Chanyeol pinched his shin. "Okay, okay," he groaned, rubbing the spot and looking wounded and finally like Chanyeol's mean best friend and not a therapist. "Then in the meantime let me at least make sure you don't die of blue balls. I know this site..." Chanyeol groaned, scrunching his nose. Baekhyun was always trying to give him porn to watch.
"We've been over this too, Baekhyun," he sighed. A broken record.
"i know, I know. You're that one anomaly in male population that doesn't find porn appealing because it's so fake. I swear you're like grade schooler when it comes to this. There are amateur videos, you know. I'm going to link you my favorite site. Find some cute naked butt to look at for once. I can't watch you mooning over Kim Jongin like this anymore."
Baekhyun swatted his thigh. "Now go sleep, you looked awful." He's left after that, and honestly Chanyeol was just glad that this time, their talk was over so quickly and Baekhyun didn't spend an hour suggesting all the ways Chanyeol could tell Jongin he had a crush on him. He head still hurt when he remembered Baekhyun suggesting he should just walk up to him and tell him he wants to eat him out. Jongin would never speak to him again.
Chanyeol doesn't know what watching amateur porn has to do with pining after Jongin, his crush ever since his last year of high school. But Jongin looked so nice today and Chanyeol just ... doesn't want to think about him for a moment because sometimes, sometimes liking Jongin this much, liking every single thing about him, even his stupid Mine Craft obsession, is exhausting.
It's not Chanyeol's smartest action when he clicks the link Baekhyun provided. But it's done, and now Chanyeol is on the main page of a porn site, most popular and currently watched videos all over his screen. It's a ... lot of naked bodies at the same time, and it's not like this is the first time Chanyeol's on a porn site, but he still feels queasy, like someone is going to look at him tomorrow and just know. It's stupid to feel this guilty, but it's better than his self induced guilt over jerking off to the memory of one of Jongin's more suggestive dance performances, so he lowers the volume and clicks to the section with all user profiles. He scrolls down, page after a page, chuckling at some of the user names but otherwise not really watching anything. He's about to give up and go to sleep because clearly this was not happening when a user name catches his eye.
Jjangu'sdaddy
Chanyeol chokes on nothing, staring. The profile picture is that of a naked torso, lightly tones stomach, smooth chest, prominent collarbones.
It's probably just a coincidence, and were it any other friend of his, Chanyeol'd be texting him already. But this is Jongin's Mine Craft user name. Chanyeol's teased him about it before, how it sounds a little ridiculous and if he didn't know Jjangu's just a dog, it'd be a little dirty to say the least. Jongin had blushed and cut of the camera feed off and told Chanyeol he was a pervert, and Chanyeol let him off the hook. Now, Chanyeol clicks the profile before the sane part of his brain can stop it. There are lewd comments under the simple intro about the user name that, for a moment, distract Chanyeol from everything else. But then his eyes slide back up. The intro just says 'a dancer'. Chanyeol blinks.
This user has about twenty videos uploaded. All but one have a price tag on them and no preview image. The first one, however, is different.
My intro so you know what you'll be paying for, the description says.
Chanyeol will not click on it. He will hightail off this site right now and never come back. Even if this person turns out to look nothing like Jongin, it all makes Chanyeol's stomach churn with nerves. It's nerves, not curiosity, he will not click, he will not click, he will not ...
The video starts with a dark screen, and only after a few seconds, a male frame, a lean body only in tight black boxers, appears. It looks about Jongin's height and built, Chanyeol's brain supplies unhelpfully. He's most likely projecting.
The man doesn't show his face, but plays with a camera a little so that the room behind him and the bed are better visible. Chanyeol's stomach does another sickening flop. The man in the video lies down on the bed, and Chanyeol would applaud his camera skills because his face stays out of the frame still, but he's frozen in place. The room looks eerily familiar. Like he's seen it hundreds of times. He may have not been in the room that often, but he's looked at it, albeit in a worse quality of a laptop cam, plenty enough. The chair to the side looks just like Jongin's, the one Chanyeol helped him drag from a flee market, the sheets look like the dark blue ones he's spotted more than once, and those trophies on top of the chest of drawers in the right corner -- those are Jongin's dance competition trophies.
"Hey there. So uhm this is quite simple, but enjoy," a voice says. A deep voice. In a very clear Korean. A little shaky, like Jongin's gets when he's about to die because Chanyeol did something stupid in the game.
Chanyeol does not click out of the video. Instead he watches, jaw clenched and eyes so wide it hurts a little, as the man on the screen touches himself, slowly, delicately, circles across his stomach, careful fingers counting up his ribs, a pinch to his nipple. He watches as the man palms himself through his boxers, his hips lifting off his bed just a little as he groans for the first time. It goes right into Chanyeol's cock, but Chanyeol doesn't look away, doesn't move while the man on screen bucks his hips up more insistently, one hand rubbing his nipple, the other now in his boxers. He sighs and groans, and it's all the sounds Chanyeol has memorized, albeit from a very different setting. The man spreads his legs more as his hand dips into his boxers. He gives himself a few concealed tugs and then pulls the boxers down to his mid-thighs. His cock is hard, thick and so fucking nice, precome leaking out, the head a darker shade of red. The man sighs in relief, and his breath is ragged now. His hips lift a bit higher, still so languidly though, as he plays with his balls then gives himself a slow tug. He strokes his cock lightly at first and only later he speeds up and his fingers close more firmly around it. He brushes his thumb over the head on every upstroke, and Chanyeol digs his nails into his thighs, his own cock pressing uncomfortably against his jeans. The man on the screen moans loudly, one long sound pulled from him, and comes, the spurts of white coating his tummy. He slumps into the sheets, body finally still, and Chanyeol sees his chest rising up and falling down rapidly as he heaves long breaths, fingers playing with the come on his stomach. The video is cut abruptly then, probably edited so it ends where the man in it wanted it to.
It's suddenly too quiet in Chanyeol's room. His own breathing is labored, and he's so hard it's painful. His stomach hurts and his head is spinning a little, and he flings his PC away from his lap and presses a palm against his crotch. His hips jerk up, and he comes almost instantly, in his pants. Only then it rally hits him, embarrassment and shock and disbelief. He curls forward, trying to catch his breath.
Jongin has a profile on a porn site. Jongin has filmed twenty erotic videos, some of which have thousands and thousands of views. And Chanyeol's just added one view of his own, and he doesn't think he's ever going to process it. He closes his eyes and presses his hands against his ears as if that would help erase what just happened, what he just saw. It's not really helpful; all he sees behind his eyelids is Jongin spread on his sheets with a hand around his dick. All he hears is Jongin moaning as he comes. Jongin has a really nice dick, that's what he thinks about.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Chanyeol is screwed. Tomorrow, he has a lunch planned with Jongin off campus, right before Jongin's shift starts. He promised to treat him to chicken. He wishes this was all just a bad wet dream. But the uncomfortable stickiness in his boxers tells him he's very much awake. For the first time ever, he's going to be the one to cancel on Jongin. Actually, Chanyeol is just going to cancel his own entire existence. He'll just slide down and melt into the old carpet of his room. But before that he's going to kill Baekhyun.
---
I was in a hurry, so not much editing happened. Sorry for any mistakes.
Hi,
bluedreaming, it's your turn, and I'm sorry I set you up like this. ♥
"You suck at this game so much, hyung," Jongin says, snorting in laughter and disappearing from the tiny Skype window in the corner of Chanyeol's screen, probably slipping from the edge of his chair where he's been siting for the past half an hour trying to built a shelter to hide from all the zombies.. He appears a little later, slightly pink and flustered.
Chanyeol blinks and doesn't deny the accusation. "But you love me anyway," he says, trying to sound as blasé as possible.
"Yeah, sure, hyung," Jongin says, his eyes back on the game. "I should go," he adds and Chanyeol sees him logging out of the game. "It's gotten kind of late."
Chanyeol nods dumbly, maximizing the Skype window so he has a screen full of sleepy Jongin, eyes droopy, hair a floppy mess. Jongin waves in goodbye.
"Bye," Chanyeol says weakly. The moment Jongin's gone he sighs, sinking deeper into his armchair, and stares blankly at the finished Skype call.
Chanyeol doesn't like Mine Craft all that much. He supposes it's okay, but he's never got addicted. He only plays online with Jongin because the other has mentioned it once, how he wants to try playing with a partner but doesn't want to do it with some stranger, and Chanyeol just kind of ... volunteered. Most of the time he's useless, only following Jongin's directions and failing spectacularly at it. Jongin just groans and laughs at him and calls him dumb.
The best part about the nights spent gaming instead of studying and sleeping is when Jongin calls on Skype and leaves the camera on. Chanyeol spends most of those nights watching Jongin instead of following the game, getting into trouble with Jongin even more. When gaming like this, Jongin forgets that he thinks his own laugh is dumb and never stops himself when he laughs too loud and with his whole body, like this Jongin flails and explains, excited about what they're going to build next and how many things they have to dig out or create, and then he segues into what he wants to do in real life when he manages to break his vicious circle of part time job, dance practices with his team, sleep and Mine Craft. Like this, Chanyeol gets to watch without care because Jongin isn't paying attention to him, building castles in the skies or in the pixelated world of the game.
It always leaves Chanyeol a little empty when Jongin logs out carelessly and instead of freshly showered Jongin in his lose tank top, there's a reality of Chanyeol's empty room and an uncomfortable simmer of longing in his gut. Chanyeol clicks around with his mouse and ends up in his e-mail inbox, staring at the link Baekhyun sent him about a week ago. Baekhyun's such an ass. That day he's found Chanyeol playing online with Jongin again, sitting in their living room. He sighed and let Chanyeol to it, but once they finished for the night, he came back, sitting next to Chanyeol and giving him the most disgusted look ever.
"You're the most pitiful person I know. It's off putting," he said. Chanyeol dropped his head on top of his closed lap top. "Tell me again why you're spending your best years playing a game you don't even like with Jongin who doesn't even notice you when you could be out there partying and getting some?"
Chanyeol groaned. They've been over this a million times. It's not even the first time Baekhyun's used his psychotherapist voice on him. Chanyeol honestly didn't know who on earth would want to go to therapy with Byun Baekhyun and would pay for it, but they were in their last year of college and Baekhyun was convinced he'd once have a successful practice in the area.
"I mean, Chanyeol. Believe it or not, but there are people out there who'd gladly have sex with you. When you don't move too much, you're kind of attractive. There might even be someone out there willing to have a normal relationship with you."
"I don't care," Chanyeol said. Baekhyun knew this too. He turned his head and looked at Baekhyun from his spot on his overheated laptop, and Baekhyun sighed.
"Granted, they might not have an ass as fine as that of Kim Jongin, but--" he yelped when Chanyeol pinched his shin. "Okay, okay," he groaned, rubbing the spot and looking wounded and finally like Chanyeol's mean best friend and not a therapist. "Then in the meantime let me at least make sure you don't die of blue balls. I know this site..." Chanyeol groaned, scrunching his nose. Baekhyun was always trying to give him porn to watch.
"We've been over this too, Baekhyun," he sighed. A broken record.
"i know, I know. You're that one anomaly in male population that doesn't find porn appealing because it's so fake. I swear you're like grade schooler when it comes to this. There are amateur videos, you know. I'm going to link you my favorite site. Find some cute naked butt to look at for once. I can't watch you mooning over Kim Jongin like this anymore."
Baekhyun swatted his thigh. "Now go sleep, you looked awful." He's left after that, and honestly Chanyeol was just glad that this time, their talk was over so quickly and Baekhyun didn't spend an hour suggesting all the ways Chanyeol could tell Jongin he had a crush on him. He head still hurt when he remembered Baekhyun suggesting he should just walk up to him and tell him he wants to eat him out. Jongin would never speak to him again.
Chanyeol doesn't know what watching amateur porn has to do with pining after Jongin, his crush ever since his last year of high school. But Jongin looked so nice today and Chanyeol just ... doesn't want to think about him for a moment because sometimes, sometimes liking Jongin this much, liking every single thing about him, even his stupid Mine Craft obsession, is exhausting.
It's not Chanyeol's smartest action when he clicks the link Baekhyun provided. But it's done, and now Chanyeol is on the main page of a porn site, most popular and currently watched videos all over his screen. It's a ... lot of naked bodies at the same time, and it's not like this is the first time Chanyeol's on a porn site, but he still feels queasy, like someone is going to look at him tomorrow and just know. It's stupid to feel this guilty, but it's better than his self induced guilt over jerking off to the memory of one of Jongin's more suggestive dance performances, so he lowers the volume and clicks to the section with all user profiles. He scrolls down, page after a page, chuckling at some of the user names but otherwise not really watching anything. He's about to give up and go to sleep because clearly this was not happening when a user name catches his eye.
Jjangu'sdaddy
Chanyeol chokes on nothing, staring. The profile picture is that of a naked torso, lightly tones stomach, smooth chest, prominent collarbones.
It's probably just a coincidence, and were it any other friend of his, Chanyeol'd be texting him already. But this is Jongin's Mine Craft user name. Chanyeol's teased him about it before, how it sounds a little ridiculous and if he didn't know Jjangu's just a dog, it'd be a little dirty to say the least. Jongin had blushed and cut of the camera feed off and told Chanyeol he was a pervert, and Chanyeol let him off the hook. Now, Chanyeol clicks the profile before the sane part of his brain can stop it. There are lewd comments under the simple intro about the user name that, for a moment, distract Chanyeol from everything else. But then his eyes slide back up. The intro just says 'a dancer'. Chanyeol blinks.
This user has about twenty videos uploaded. All but one have a price tag on them and no preview image. The first one, however, is different.
My intro so you know what you'll be paying for, the description says.
Chanyeol will not click on it. He will hightail off this site right now and never come back. Even if this person turns out to look nothing like Jongin, it all makes Chanyeol's stomach churn with nerves. It's nerves, not curiosity, he will not click, he will not click, he will not ...
The video starts with a dark screen, and only after a few seconds, a male frame, a lean body only in tight black boxers, appears. It looks about Jongin's height and built, Chanyeol's brain supplies unhelpfully. He's most likely projecting.
The man doesn't show his face, but plays with a camera a little so that the room behind him and the bed are better visible. Chanyeol's stomach does another sickening flop. The man in the video lies down on the bed, and Chanyeol would applaud his camera skills because his face stays out of the frame still, but he's frozen in place. The room looks eerily familiar. Like he's seen it hundreds of times. He may have not been in the room that often, but he's looked at it, albeit in a worse quality of a laptop cam, plenty enough. The chair to the side looks just like Jongin's, the one Chanyeol helped him drag from a flee market, the sheets look like the dark blue ones he's spotted more than once, and those trophies on top of the chest of drawers in the right corner -- those are Jongin's dance competition trophies.
"Hey there. So uhm this is quite simple, but enjoy," a voice says. A deep voice. In a very clear Korean. A little shaky, like Jongin's gets when he's about to die because Chanyeol did something stupid in the game.
Chanyeol does not click out of the video. Instead he watches, jaw clenched and eyes so wide it hurts a little, as the man on the screen touches himself, slowly, delicately, circles across his stomach, careful fingers counting up his ribs, a pinch to his nipple. He watches as the man palms himself through his boxers, his hips lifting off his bed just a little as he groans for the first time. It goes right into Chanyeol's cock, but Chanyeol doesn't look away, doesn't move while the man on screen bucks his hips up more insistently, one hand rubbing his nipple, the other now in his boxers. He sighs and groans, and it's all the sounds Chanyeol has memorized, albeit from a very different setting. The man spreads his legs more as his hand dips into his boxers. He gives himself a few concealed tugs and then pulls the boxers down to his mid-thighs. His cock is hard, thick and so fucking nice, precome leaking out, the head a darker shade of red. The man sighs in relief, and his breath is ragged now. His hips lift a bit higher, still so languidly though, as he plays with his balls then gives himself a slow tug. He strokes his cock lightly at first and only later he speeds up and his fingers close more firmly around it. He brushes his thumb over the head on every upstroke, and Chanyeol digs his nails into his thighs, his own cock pressing uncomfortably against his jeans. The man on the screen moans loudly, one long sound pulled from him, and comes, the spurts of white coating his tummy. He slumps into the sheets, body finally still, and Chanyeol sees his chest rising up and falling down rapidly as he heaves long breaths, fingers playing with the come on his stomach. The video is cut abruptly then, probably edited so it ends where the man in it wanted it to.
It's suddenly too quiet in Chanyeol's room. His own breathing is labored, and he's so hard it's painful. His stomach hurts and his head is spinning a little, and he flings his PC away from his lap and presses a palm against his crotch. His hips jerk up, and he comes almost instantly, in his pants. Only then it rally hits him, embarrassment and shock and disbelief. He curls forward, trying to catch his breath.
Jongin has a profile on a porn site. Jongin has filmed twenty erotic videos, some of which have thousands and thousands of views. And Chanyeol's just added one view of his own, and he doesn't think he's ever going to process it. He closes his eyes and presses his hands against his ears as if that would help erase what just happened, what he just saw. It's not really helpful; all he sees behind his eyelids is Jongin spread on his sheets with a hand around his dick. All he hears is Jongin moaning as he comes. Jongin has a really nice dick, that's what he thinks about.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Chanyeol is screwed. Tomorrow, he has a lunch planned with Jongin off campus, right before Jongin's shift starts. He promised to treat him to chicken. He wishes this was all just a bad wet dream. But the uncomfortable stickiness in his boxers tells him he's very much awake. For the first time ever, he's going to be the one to cancel on Jongin. Actually, Chanyeol is just going to cancel his own entire existence. He'll just slide down and melt into the old carpet of his room. But before that he's going to kill Baekhyun.
---
I was in a hurry, so not much editing happened. Sorry for any mistakes.
Hi,

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I can't wait to read the rest of it! (WHAT is Chanyeol going to do?!?!?)
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I LOVED THIS thank u for writing it omfaskl;gdla;s <3333333
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