yrindor (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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writetomyheart2020-11-23 01:33 am
yrindor) wrote in writetomyheart2020-11-23 01:33 am
Entry tags:
[Team Three] Filed with Prejudice
In which Jakurai finds himself pitted against the wheels of bureaucracy. Hypnosis Mic, Jakurai & Jyuuto, G, 1300w
He had to do the paperwork before he could leave. There were many parts of his job that he enjoyed less than others, but needless paperwork was near the top of the list. Patient charts and discharge instructions were one thing. Even if he did not enjoy the process of writing them, he understood their value, but this was busy work. He swore they went through this every few years. A new hospital administrator would come on board with their own ideas of how things should be done and unilaterally declare it to be the new hospital policy.
For reasons that Jakurai still could not understand, they never seemed to ask for input from the staff on the ground, not even to inquire if any of their ideas had been tried before. As a result, the staff would spend the next weeks or months scrambling to comply with an illogical and poorly planned system that did not serve their needs and was beyond their means to comply.
Jakurai estimated the current iteration of pointless bureaucratic wrangling had roughly three weeks left in its cycle. Two weeks ago had been the requisite all-staff meeting and daily memos to chastise staff for not filling out every field of every form to the prescribed degree of specificity. The new memo as of this morning had reversed course to call out staff for excessive overtime. In another few weeks, they would undoubtedly realize the impossibility of reconciling both issues and abandon the new system.
Until then, he was trapped at his desk filling out unnecessarily tedious forms designed by someone who had quite clearly never actually seen a patient in any capacity. Why they seemed to think hair color and favorite music genre were useful metrics to record, but made no mention of previous drug reactions was beyond him. This was not some sort of fan club application or personality quiz; it was a hospital intake form intended to streamline and improve patient care.
If he were feeling charitable, he might suggest that the new forms were streamlining the route from desk to printer to recycling bin, but even that would be a stretch.
He rubbed his temples and turned to the next chart in his pile. He would need to call Hifumi soon and let him know that he would be late to dinner. There was no way he would finish these by the end of his shift, but the same administrators who had warned everyone against taking overtime this morning had written him up yesterday for failing to complete all of his paperwork before he left. He knew they would realize they were asking for the impossible eventually, but that didn't make the situation any less frustrating in the meantime.
When his phone rang, he picked it up without looking at the number. It was probably Hifumi inquiring about dinner, but at this point, he would quite possibly have accepted a telemarketer just to have a break. "Jinguji Jakurai speaking. How may I help you?" he said.
"Jakurai, Iruma Jyuto calling. We have a problem."
"What sort of a problem?" Jakurai asked. It wasn't unheard of for the police to contact the hospital, but for a detective to contact him personally, especially when said detective was also a member of a rival crew, was certainly unusual.
"What are you doing right now?"
"Nothing that can't be interrupted. The hospital has decided paperwork can solve all ills."
"That's funny," Jyuto said, "and also the problem. Would you believe me if I said I'm supposed to be doing the same thing right now, and for the same reasons?"
"I don't think I follow, Jyuto. Are you saying that you called me specifically because of paperwork you do not wish to be doing?"
"No. I'm calling because our divisions both have territory battles this weekend, and instead of planning and practicing, we're both trapped in the office doing busywork that we know is useless. I did some digging on the administrator who's ground our precinct to a halt with bullshit forms. I don't give her, or whoever sent her, many points for brains since they didn't even try to cover their tracks before showing up in a police station. Anyway, the point is, while I was digging around, I discovered that she wasn't the only one. Your hospital hired a new administrator from the same agency on the same day despite neither of our workplaces having an open job posting for such a position. Not only that, they're both false identities. I couldn't dig too much here without raising red flags, but I asked Riou to see what he could find. He said there are no birth certificates or any other public records under either of these names until a few months ago, and once you look past name and general appearance, they're identical, right down to matching resumes."
Jakurai frowned and pushed away from his computer. He might not trust Jyuto, but if it gave him a way out of endless forms, he would at least listen. "Are you saying someone is trying to weaponize paperwork?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying. Someone's trying to sabotage us before the next territory battle, and they're using useless busy work to do so."
"An operation of this magnitude couldn't have been cheap," Jakurai said. "I doubt the smaller divisions we're facing would have the resources for this." His own division was better funded than most, but just the bribes something like this would entail would strain their resources.
"I don't think we're looking at rival divisions," Jyuto said. "I have reason to believe this operation is coming from the very top."
"From Chuuoku?" That couldn't be right.
"Don't say it so loudly," Jyuto hissed. "You don't know who might be listening."
Jakurai stood and began pacing across his office. On the one hand, what Jyuto was suggesting was absurd. On the other hand, it was no less absurd than some of the paperwork he had been asked to fill out recently, and every good clinician knew not to throw out a possibility entirely simply because it was improbably. "If you're right, then what do we do?"
"The first step is confirming those suspicions. I can't bring this to my division leader. I fear he may be compromised through his sister, but if this is coming from where I believe it is, then Fling Posse's leader may know more about it. You'll have better luck getting information from him than I will. I'll keep working with Riou to see what we can uncover about how they pulled this off. Jyuto out."
The call disconnected, leaving Jakurai staring at the now-silent phone in his hand. Contact Ramuda. Jyuto had said it so nonchalantly, as if it were no more difficult than asking someone about the weather. Jyuto hadn't been part of the Dirty Dawg; he was still too new to know all of the history.
Jakurai could almost taste the bubblegum pink hair that flickered at the edges of his memory even now. He could probably convince Ramuda to talk; Fling Posse's leader never turned down a chance to needle and infuriate his old partner. Whether he could get the information Jyuto wanted was another matter.
His fingers hovered over his contact list. Ramuda was still there at the top. He kept meaning to fix that, but somehow it never seemed to happen. Out of sight, out of mind they said, but would he ever successfully expel the sight of Ramuda from his mind?
He made his decision and tapped the call button.
"Hello, Hifumi," he said when the call connected. "It's wonderful to hear you too. I apologize, but I've been delayed at work again. Something came up that needs my attention."
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He had to do the paperwork before he could leave. There were many parts of his job that he enjoyed less than others, but needless paperwork was near the top of the list. Patient charts and discharge instructions were one thing. Even if he did not enjoy the process of writing them, he understood their value, but this was busy work. He swore they went through this every few years. A new hospital administrator would come on board with their own ideas of how things should be done and unilaterally declare it to be the new hospital policy.
For reasons that Jakurai still could not understand, they never seemed to ask for input from the staff on the ground, not even to inquire if any of their ideas had been tried before. As a result, the staff would spend the next weeks or months scrambling to comply with an illogical and poorly planned system that did not serve their needs and was beyond their means to comply.
Jakurai estimated the current iteration of pointless bureaucratic wrangling had roughly three weeks left in its cycle. Two weeks ago had been the requisite all-staff meeting and daily memos to chastise staff for not filling out every field of every form to the prescribed degree of specificity. The new memo as of this morning had reversed course to call out staff for excessive overtime. In another few weeks, they would undoubtedly realize the impossibility of reconciling both issues and abandon the new system.
Until then, he was trapped at his desk filling out unnecessarily tedious forms designed by someone who had quite clearly never actually seen a patient in any capacity. Why they seemed to think hair color and favorite music genre were useful metrics to record, but made no mention of previous drug reactions was beyond him. This was not some sort of fan club application or personality quiz; it was a hospital intake form intended to streamline and improve patient care.
If he were feeling charitable, he might suggest that the new forms were streamlining the route from desk to printer to recycling bin, but even that would be a stretch.
He rubbed his temples and turned to the next chart in his pile. He would need to call Hifumi soon and let him know that he would be late to dinner. There was no way he would finish these by the end of his shift, but the same administrators who had warned everyone against taking overtime this morning had written him up yesterday for failing to complete all of his paperwork before he left. He knew they would realize they were asking for the impossible eventually, but that didn't make the situation any less frustrating in the meantime.
When his phone rang, he picked it up without looking at the number. It was probably Hifumi inquiring about dinner, but at this point, he would quite possibly have accepted a telemarketer just to have a break. "Jinguji Jakurai speaking. How may I help you?" he said.
"Jakurai, Iruma Jyuto calling. We have a problem."
"What sort of a problem?" Jakurai asked. It wasn't unheard of for the police to contact the hospital, but for a detective to contact him personally, especially when said detective was also a member of a rival crew, was certainly unusual.
"What are you doing right now?"
"Nothing that can't be interrupted. The hospital has decided paperwork can solve all ills."
"That's funny," Jyuto said, "and also the problem. Would you believe me if I said I'm supposed to be doing the same thing right now, and for the same reasons?"
"I don't think I follow, Jyuto. Are you saying that you called me specifically because of paperwork you do not wish to be doing?"
"No. I'm calling because our divisions both have territory battles this weekend, and instead of planning and practicing, we're both trapped in the office doing busywork that we know is useless. I did some digging on the administrator who's ground our precinct to a halt with bullshit forms. I don't give her, or whoever sent her, many points for brains since they didn't even try to cover their tracks before showing up in a police station. Anyway, the point is, while I was digging around, I discovered that she wasn't the only one. Your hospital hired a new administrator from the same agency on the same day despite neither of our workplaces having an open job posting for such a position. Not only that, they're both false identities. I couldn't dig too much here without raising red flags, but I asked Riou to see what he could find. He said there are no birth certificates or any other public records under either of these names until a few months ago, and once you look past name and general appearance, they're identical, right down to matching resumes."
Jakurai frowned and pushed away from his computer. He might not trust Jyuto, but if it gave him a way out of endless forms, he would at least listen. "Are you saying someone is trying to weaponize paperwork?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying. Someone's trying to sabotage us before the next territory battle, and they're using useless busy work to do so."
"An operation of this magnitude couldn't have been cheap," Jakurai said. "I doubt the smaller divisions we're facing would have the resources for this." His own division was better funded than most, but just the bribes something like this would entail would strain their resources.
"I don't think we're looking at rival divisions," Jyuto said. "I have reason to believe this operation is coming from the very top."
"From Chuuoku?" That couldn't be right.
"Don't say it so loudly," Jyuto hissed. "You don't know who might be listening."
Jakurai stood and began pacing across his office. On the one hand, what Jyuto was suggesting was absurd. On the other hand, it was no less absurd than some of the paperwork he had been asked to fill out recently, and every good clinician knew not to throw out a possibility entirely simply because it was improbably. "If you're right, then what do we do?"
"The first step is confirming those suspicions. I can't bring this to my division leader. I fear he may be compromised through his sister, but if this is coming from where I believe it is, then Fling Posse's leader may know more about it. You'll have better luck getting information from him than I will. I'll keep working with Riou to see what we can uncover about how they pulled this off. Jyuto out."
The call disconnected, leaving Jakurai staring at the now-silent phone in his hand. Contact Ramuda. Jyuto had said it so nonchalantly, as if it were no more difficult than asking someone about the weather. Jyuto hadn't been part of the Dirty Dawg; he was still too new to know all of the history.
Jakurai could almost taste the bubblegum pink hair that flickered at the edges of his memory even now. He could probably convince Ramuda to talk; Fling Posse's leader never turned down a chance to needle and infuriate his old partner. Whether he could get the information Jyuto wanted was another matter.
His fingers hovered over his contact list. Ramuda was still there at the top. He kept meaning to fix that, but somehow it never seemed to happen. Out of sight, out of mind they said, but would he ever successfully expel the sight of Ramuda from his mind?
He made his decision and tapped the call button.
"Hello, Hifumi," he said when the call connected. "It's wonderful to hear you too. I apologize, but I've been delayed at work again. Something came up that needs my attention."
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alchemicink!