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writetomyheart2014-06-16 03:31 am
doctoggy.livejournal.com) wrote in writetomyheart2014-06-16 03:31 am
[Team 3] Doing it wrong
Rushed. It is kind of a mess. And the byproduct of a conversation with ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
nekobot01 involving 354678897654 HasshixTottsu situations.
Title: Doing it wrong
Pairing: HashimotoxTotsuka
Summary: There are no kisses at the end of their dates. Which makes Hasshi wonder if they are even dating, or its all in his head.
Warnings: Mildly self imposed angsty, and then fluffy.
Sorry for any mistakes, as I said it was quick and dirty and rushed but I didnt want to pass.
“Dates are supposed to end with a kiss.” Hashimoto muttered quietly to himself, sitting on the couch flipping through on of their latest magazine shoots. It had been the wedding shoot, with them in the suits at the church, and honestly, between that shooting, and the Mahou Danshi Cherry’s filming which was focusing on keeping them virtuous, he had been thinking more and more about romance.
And more and more about dates.
And more and more about what constituted a date.
Which lead to thoughts about kissing and—
Hashimoto stopped thinking, his attention turning to Kawai he settled on the couch next to him. The older man leaned over, sharp chin pressing into his shoulder as Kawai looked at the magazine as well.
“You are frowning Hasshi. Something wrong with the shoot? You liked it at the time.” Kawai kept his voice low and Hashimoto’s frown deepened.
“Dates end with a kiss right?”
“Hmm.” Kawai answered non-committaly. He was not sure where Hashimoto was going with this, and sometimes it was better to just let it be.
“All the dramas, and the manga, and movies say that dates end with a kiss. All of them.” Hashimoto continued, and Kawai hmmed again. He was starting to see the way this was going, the tight grip that Hashimoto had on Totsuka’s shoot in the magazine.
“Tottsu and I go out all the time.”
Kawai nodded. This was true.
“We have dinner, and sometimes go to the park, or to the movies, and go shopping. And he always refuses to let me carry by bags. And he pays, and even why I try and pay he manages to do it first. And its always fun.”
“And he thinks they are fun too.” Kawai could answer that with certainty.
“But if I try and hold his hand, he scolds me that we are in public. And when he drops me off, he never lets me kiss him. And if I try and hug him, he also reminds me that we were in public.” Hashimoto turned to Kawai, he eyes wide, and it looked like his world was ending.
“I love him. And I thought he loved me too. Though he never says as much, cause its Tottsu, and words can be hard for him, at least feeling words, but I thought we were dating, and now I don’t know, and Fumitooooooooooo, what do I do? I don’t know what I will do if Tottsu doesn't love me to, and I love him, and, and, and….” Hashimoto collapsed on the couch, the magazine dropping to his lap, and he looked so sad, and so lost that. “Fumito, he loves me, right?”
While he was processing the words Kawai shifted, pulling Hashimoto into a tight embrace. The other just looked like he needed a hug. Hashimoto should never look that sad. Ever. It also gave Kawai a moment to think and to process things.
If he was not used to a hyperventilating, panicking Hashimoto, Kawai might not have been able to understand what the younger boy was freaking out about. But as a young teenager, and not a young man, full of many many many feelings, they had gotten somewhat used to handing Hashimoto’s overwhelming feelings.
This, however, was a landmine waiting to happen.
Thankfully, the assistant for their photoshoot for the day came in, and asked if they were ready, the others having just finished make up. They had gone straight to set. All that was needed were there two youngest members. With one last tight hug, and a quick ruffle of his hair, Kawai stood and offered Hashimoto his hand, pulling the other up and into an ‘accidental’ hug before they left.
The others would notice something was off. They always did. Hashimoto was easy to read. The important question, though, was would Totsuka be able to tell what was wrong without Hashimoto having another freak out?
Thankfully Totsuka (and the rest of A.B.C-Z) was intuitive enough to tell that something was wrong with Hashimoto. Honestly it was probably as if everyone in the entire building could tell that something was wrong with Hashimoto, as the smiles, and the mood was just off. And he was giving off more of a kicked puppy snuggle me vibe, rather than an I love A.B.C-Z and my band and the world and I just want to make the fans HAPPY vibe.
But nothing anyone could say in the short breaks in the photoshoot was enough to get him smiling and happy off camera.
They all tried. And when Totsuka failed, it was serious.
It didn't affect the takes for the group shots, but the mood was very sullen, for A.B.C-Z and Tsukada went overboard with Kawai on the theatrics for the day, to distract the staff.
Of course, since it summer, and a summer shoot, the theme was summer dates. Which meant various shots of them in various positions and poses and closeness that were appropriate for magazines and enough to get fangirls hearts going.
And every time that someone mentioned the word date, Hashimoto would twitch.
Every time someone mentioned Totsuka and any member of A.B.C-Z that was not Hashimoto and the word date, in reference to a photo shoot set, the wounded kicked puppy expression started to creep up again.
Kawai was just glad that Hashimoto’s shoots with Totsuka were after lunch, as it would give the other a chance to fix things. As it was all morning he had been sending Hashimoto intense, direct glances, and Hashimoto was so out of it, he wasn't even noticing how concerned Totsuka seemed to be.
Usually the dark intensity of Totsuka’s gaze watching him, was enough to make Hashimoto light up brighter than the stage effects of a JE concert. But not this time. Which then had Totsuka frowning, his gaze following Hashimoto the entire time the younger man was shooting his ‘date’ with Goseki.
Kawai was just glad that he didn't have to say anything, since the moment the lunch break was announced, Totsuka was gliding over to Hashimoto, asking the other to go with him back to the green room.
Kawai watched them go with a fond smile, and Goseki slid up beside him, not asking what was up, but Kawai told him anyways.
“Totsuka is doing it wrong. I don't know how, but he is. Hasshi, he wondered if they were even mutually love.” He waited until Goseki was taking a drink to make the comment. Somehow, his timing was perfect. So perfect in fact that when Goseki spit out his water in disbelief, it was all over Tsukada.
Oops.
Totsuka didn't say anything when they got back to their green room, and Hashimoto was glad. It gave him time to think. Totsuka just shut the door and pulled Hashimoto into a tight hug, leaning back against the door. He could feel the other frown a little, when Hashimoto took a moment to hug him back, and Totsuka’s arms tightened around him, as if the force of the hug could fix whatever was bothering Hashimoto.
Hashimoto took a step back, and his jaw was set, his eyes bright, and expression firm.
“Tottsu, you know I love ya, right?” Hashimoto asked directly, and he could see Totsuka’s eyes widen, but the other didn't say anything. “I’ve loved you forever and ever.” Totsuka smiled, but was silent.
“And we hang out all the time. And it is always a lot of fun.”
Totsuka nodded, hmming his agreement. “You know I enjoy spending time with you Hasshi.” His voice was mild, a hint of fondness there that was always there when he talked to Hashimoto. But Hashimoto was not sure if there was also affection there.
Hashimoto stepped forward, and grabbed Totsuka’s hand.
Totsuka let him hold it for a moment, before pulling his hand away. “Hasshi, we are at work. You know we can’t.” There was no scolding in his voice, not really. But the response still cut.
Totuka really didn't care for him. He would even hold his hand, in a dressing room with a closed door.
Hashimoto deflated, stepped away from Totsuka and curling up on the couch, hugging a pillow to his chest. The words he spoke into the pillow were soft, but somehow Totsuka seemed to hear them anyway, if the quiet gasp, and the additional weight on the couch was any indication. Hashimoto was manhandled into a settling position, though he still stayed curled around the pillow, his eyes peeking out from beneath his bangs.
Totsuka’s gaze was dark and intense. It was the gaze that he fell in love with.
It was also slightly less composed that usual.
“Ryosuke, what do you mean that ‘you were right and Tottsu never loved me’?”
“Dates end with kissed. Everyone knows that.” Hashimoto started, glaring up at Totsuka, and the other just stared back, waiting for the other to continue. After a moment, when it was clear that Totsuka was not going to response, he continued.
“But when we go out, you won’t hold my hand. You won’t let me hug you. You won’t do anything. Even when you drop me off at home. You never take me home, or let me stay over anymore. And I thought they were dates. But I guess they weren’t. And I thought--” Hashimoto stopped speaking, noticing the way that Totsuka seemed to be gaping at him, his eyes wide.
He had managed to ruffle Totsuka, it seemed.
“You won’t even hold my hand in the dressing room, Tottsu. I just, I just want you to love me but you don't.” His voice was sad, he could hear it himself, and the way that Totsuka was looking at him now was unreadable.
Hashimoto hated not knowing what that gaze meant. He had to look away.
“Hasshi…” Totsuka said after a moment, his voice soft.
Hashimoto did not look at him, clutching the pillow tighter instead.
“Ryosuke….” He tried again, this time with a gentle hand on the side of Hashimoto’s face, thumb tracing along the cheekbone.
He didn't turn his head.
Except then, suddenly, Totsuka was shifting around, twisting his body in a way that had to hurt, his eyes intense and dark, flashing with something for a moment before his lips brushed lightly over Hashimoto’s.
“I am sorry that I made you sad. But I do love you.” Totsuka shifted, sitting up, and Hashimoto followed the movement. Totsuka had a soft smile on his face.
“How about our next date is a home date. No prying eyes, nothing to worry about. You can have all the kisses that you want.” Hashimoto took a moment to process the words, and then he threw the pillow to the side, pouncing on Totsuka and hugging his tight.
“Tottsu is the bestest.”
Totsuka’s arms wound tightly around Hashimoto. “Don’t ever doubt that.”
Later, as lunch was ending, the Hashimoto that everyone knew and loved was back, more or less full force. He was buzzing with happiness and fluttering around the set watching everything. His laughter, and his smiles, was something that had been missing in the morning.
“We are ready for Totsuka-san and Hashimoto-san’s date. This is the last one of the day. They we just have the group shots.” The assistant called out, and Hashimoto shot Kawai a large grin.
“Tottsu doesn't need to go on any more dates after this. After all, he has me.”
This time, sadly, Kawai’s timing was slightly less that perfect. Since he chocked all over his water, spitting it on Goseki, who stared at Kawai in anger. However, the anger turned to understanding with Hashimoto slung an arm around Totsuka’s waist, pulling him close before they moved to the shoot.
As he spoke his voice was loud enough that his band could hear him, but they all know of his love for Totsuka, His voice was a little possessive, as well but Totsuka smiled indulgently at him, leaning into the embrace. “First and last. I am the only date that you need.”
arashijun you are next!
nekobot01 involving 354678897654 HasshixTottsu situations. Title: Doing it wrong
Pairing: HashimotoxTotsuka
Summary: There are no kisses at the end of their dates. Which makes Hasshi wonder if they are even dating, or its all in his head.
Warnings: Mildly self imposed angsty, and then fluffy.
Sorry for any mistakes, as I said it was quick and dirty and rushed but I didnt want to pass.
“Dates are supposed to end with a kiss.” Hashimoto muttered quietly to himself, sitting on the couch flipping through on of their latest magazine shoots. It had been the wedding shoot, with them in the suits at the church, and honestly, between that shooting, and the Mahou Danshi Cherry’s filming which was focusing on keeping them virtuous, he had been thinking more and more about romance.
And more and more about dates.
And more and more about what constituted a date.
Which lead to thoughts about kissing and—
Hashimoto stopped thinking, his attention turning to Kawai he settled on the couch next to him. The older man leaned over, sharp chin pressing into his shoulder as Kawai looked at the magazine as well.
“You are frowning Hasshi. Something wrong with the shoot? You liked it at the time.” Kawai kept his voice low and Hashimoto’s frown deepened.
“Dates end with a kiss right?”
“Hmm.” Kawai answered non-committaly. He was not sure where Hashimoto was going with this, and sometimes it was better to just let it be.
“All the dramas, and the manga, and movies say that dates end with a kiss. All of them.” Hashimoto continued, and Kawai hmmed again. He was starting to see the way this was going, the tight grip that Hashimoto had on Totsuka’s shoot in the magazine.
“Tottsu and I go out all the time.”
Kawai nodded. This was true.
“We have dinner, and sometimes go to the park, or to the movies, and go shopping. And he always refuses to let me carry by bags. And he pays, and even why I try and pay he manages to do it first. And its always fun.”
“And he thinks they are fun too.” Kawai could answer that with certainty.
“But if I try and hold his hand, he scolds me that we are in public. And when he drops me off, he never lets me kiss him. And if I try and hug him, he also reminds me that we were in public.” Hashimoto turned to Kawai, he eyes wide, and it looked like his world was ending.
“I love him. And I thought he loved me too. Though he never says as much, cause its Tottsu, and words can be hard for him, at least feeling words, but I thought we were dating, and now I don’t know, and Fumitooooooooooo, what do I do? I don’t know what I will do if Tottsu doesn't love me to, and I love him, and, and, and….” Hashimoto collapsed on the couch, the magazine dropping to his lap, and he looked so sad, and so lost that. “Fumito, he loves me, right?”
While he was processing the words Kawai shifted, pulling Hashimoto into a tight embrace. The other just looked like he needed a hug. Hashimoto should never look that sad. Ever. It also gave Kawai a moment to think and to process things.
If he was not used to a hyperventilating, panicking Hashimoto, Kawai might not have been able to understand what the younger boy was freaking out about. But as a young teenager, and not a young man, full of many many many feelings, they had gotten somewhat used to handing Hashimoto’s overwhelming feelings.
This, however, was a landmine waiting to happen.
Thankfully, the assistant for their photoshoot for the day came in, and asked if they were ready, the others having just finished make up. They had gone straight to set. All that was needed were there two youngest members. With one last tight hug, and a quick ruffle of his hair, Kawai stood and offered Hashimoto his hand, pulling the other up and into an ‘accidental’ hug before they left.
The others would notice something was off. They always did. Hashimoto was easy to read. The important question, though, was would Totsuka be able to tell what was wrong without Hashimoto having another freak out?
Thankfully Totsuka (and the rest of A.B.C-Z) was intuitive enough to tell that something was wrong with Hashimoto. Honestly it was probably as if everyone in the entire building could tell that something was wrong with Hashimoto, as the smiles, and the mood was just off. And he was giving off more of a kicked puppy snuggle me vibe, rather than an I love A.B.C-Z and my band and the world and I just want to make the fans HAPPY vibe.
But nothing anyone could say in the short breaks in the photoshoot was enough to get him smiling and happy off camera.
They all tried. And when Totsuka failed, it was serious.
It didn't affect the takes for the group shots, but the mood was very sullen, for A.B.C-Z and Tsukada went overboard with Kawai on the theatrics for the day, to distract the staff.
Of course, since it summer, and a summer shoot, the theme was summer dates. Which meant various shots of them in various positions and poses and closeness that were appropriate for magazines and enough to get fangirls hearts going.
And every time that someone mentioned the word date, Hashimoto would twitch.
Every time someone mentioned Totsuka and any member of A.B.C-Z that was not Hashimoto and the word date, in reference to a photo shoot set, the wounded kicked puppy expression started to creep up again.
Kawai was just glad that Hashimoto’s shoots with Totsuka were after lunch, as it would give the other a chance to fix things. As it was all morning he had been sending Hashimoto intense, direct glances, and Hashimoto was so out of it, he wasn't even noticing how concerned Totsuka seemed to be.
Usually the dark intensity of Totsuka’s gaze watching him, was enough to make Hashimoto light up brighter than the stage effects of a JE concert. But not this time. Which then had Totsuka frowning, his gaze following Hashimoto the entire time the younger man was shooting his ‘date’ with Goseki.
Kawai was just glad that he didn't have to say anything, since the moment the lunch break was announced, Totsuka was gliding over to Hashimoto, asking the other to go with him back to the green room.
Kawai watched them go with a fond smile, and Goseki slid up beside him, not asking what was up, but Kawai told him anyways.
“Totsuka is doing it wrong. I don't know how, but he is. Hasshi, he wondered if they were even mutually love.” He waited until Goseki was taking a drink to make the comment. Somehow, his timing was perfect. So perfect in fact that when Goseki spit out his water in disbelief, it was all over Tsukada.
Oops.
Totsuka didn't say anything when they got back to their green room, and Hashimoto was glad. It gave him time to think. Totsuka just shut the door and pulled Hashimoto into a tight hug, leaning back against the door. He could feel the other frown a little, when Hashimoto took a moment to hug him back, and Totsuka’s arms tightened around him, as if the force of the hug could fix whatever was bothering Hashimoto.
Hashimoto took a step back, and his jaw was set, his eyes bright, and expression firm.
“Tottsu, you know I love ya, right?” Hashimoto asked directly, and he could see Totsuka’s eyes widen, but the other didn't say anything. “I’ve loved you forever and ever.” Totsuka smiled, but was silent.
“And we hang out all the time. And it is always a lot of fun.”
Totsuka nodded, hmming his agreement. “You know I enjoy spending time with you Hasshi.” His voice was mild, a hint of fondness there that was always there when he talked to Hashimoto. But Hashimoto was not sure if there was also affection there.
Hashimoto stepped forward, and grabbed Totsuka’s hand.
Totsuka let him hold it for a moment, before pulling his hand away. “Hasshi, we are at work. You know we can’t.” There was no scolding in his voice, not really. But the response still cut.
Totuka really didn't care for him. He would even hold his hand, in a dressing room with a closed door.
Hashimoto deflated, stepped away from Totsuka and curling up on the couch, hugging a pillow to his chest. The words he spoke into the pillow were soft, but somehow Totsuka seemed to hear them anyway, if the quiet gasp, and the additional weight on the couch was any indication. Hashimoto was manhandled into a settling position, though he still stayed curled around the pillow, his eyes peeking out from beneath his bangs.
Totsuka’s gaze was dark and intense. It was the gaze that he fell in love with.
It was also slightly less composed that usual.
“Ryosuke, what do you mean that ‘you were right and Tottsu never loved me’?”
“Dates end with kissed. Everyone knows that.” Hashimoto started, glaring up at Totsuka, and the other just stared back, waiting for the other to continue. After a moment, when it was clear that Totsuka was not going to response, he continued.
“But when we go out, you won’t hold my hand. You won’t let me hug you. You won’t do anything. Even when you drop me off at home. You never take me home, or let me stay over anymore. And I thought they were dates. But I guess they weren’t. And I thought--” Hashimoto stopped speaking, noticing the way that Totsuka seemed to be gaping at him, his eyes wide.
He had managed to ruffle Totsuka, it seemed.
“You won’t even hold my hand in the dressing room, Tottsu. I just, I just want you to love me but you don't.” His voice was sad, he could hear it himself, and the way that Totsuka was looking at him now was unreadable.
Hashimoto hated not knowing what that gaze meant. He had to look away.
“Hasshi…” Totsuka said after a moment, his voice soft.
Hashimoto did not look at him, clutching the pillow tighter instead.
“Ryosuke….” He tried again, this time with a gentle hand on the side of Hashimoto’s face, thumb tracing along the cheekbone.
He didn't turn his head.
Except then, suddenly, Totsuka was shifting around, twisting his body in a way that had to hurt, his eyes intense and dark, flashing with something for a moment before his lips brushed lightly over Hashimoto’s.
“I am sorry that I made you sad. But I do love you.” Totsuka shifted, sitting up, and Hashimoto followed the movement. Totsuka had a soft smile on his face.
“How about our next date is a home date. No prying eyes, nothing to worry about. You can have all the kisses that you want.” Hashimoto took a moment to process the words, and then he threw the pillow to the side, pouncing on Totsuka and hugging his tight.
“Tottsu is the bestest.”
Totsuka’s arms wound tightly around Hashimoto. “Don’t ever doubt that.”
Later, as lunch was ending, the Hashimoto that everyone knew and loved was back, more or less full force. He was buzzing with happiness and fluttering around the set watching everything. His laughter, and his smiles, was something that had been missing in the morning.
“We are ready for Totsuka-san and Hashimoto-san’s date. This is the last one of the day. They we just have the group shots.” The assistant called out, and Hashimoto shot Kawai a large grin.
“Tottsu doesn't need to go on any more dates after this. After all, he has me.”
This time, sadly, Kawai’s timing was slightly less that perfect. Since he chocked all over his water, spitting it on Goseki, who stared at Kawai in anger. However, the anger turned to understanding with Hashimoto slung an arm around Totsuka’s waist, pulling him close before they moved to the shoot.
As he spoke his voice was loud enough that his band could hear him, but they all know of his love for Totsuka, His voice was a little possessive, as well but Totsuka smiled indulgently at him, leaning into the embrace. “First and last. I am the only date that you need.”
arashijun you are next!
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Poor Hasshi!! Tottsu really is bad at expressing himself~~
This was so cuteeeee! And Tsuka-chan happening to walk by… XD
I'm going to scour the recent crosstalks for any Cherry's tidbits.
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I think my favorite parts were ill timed drink spits. :)