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[team three] follow the leader
This time it's Not Me again, some focus on
"We have a plan, so let's go. White, go the fuck home. This isn't your battle to fight." Black speaks as if he's got power over him — and he does, a little, he was always the one protecting him, but while learning to be like his brother White has ironically come into his own, discovered more about who he wants to be — and it's not someone who listens to his stupid brother making stupid decisions for him.
"Fuck you. Are you the only person here?" says White. He's painfully aware of the others watching them, watching him argue maybe a little petulantly for his place in the gang. "I'm part of this now, whether you like it or not. You're not freezing me out. I'm coming with you." He leaves out the part where he doesn't know what else he can do, now. He left his old life behind when he fought with his father, immersing himself in taking the role of Black, however different he turned out to be in the end. If he doesn't have his new friends, this new purpose, who is he anymore, if he can't with good conscience go back to the privilege and safety he used to live in?
Black barely shows the surprise at his outburst, that he's speaking up for himself. Maybe the others don't notice, but despite years of distance, White knows him, recognizes the microexpressions he sees in his own face in the mirror.
And then his face hardens again, with that cold expression that makes White nervous despite himself. "You want to risk your life? Stop being an idiot. You'll only slow us down." He turns and exits the garage.
White is left with the rest of the gang in an uncomfortable silence. It’s been strange since he revealed his true identity to them, not knowing how to act now that he can technically be himself. Whoever that is anymore. He has tried so hard to be like Black that even though he failed to be accurate, part of him changed nonetheless. And with the gang realizing that they had been talking to someone they didn’t really know, they didn’t seem to know how to act either.
Finally, Yok says, “For the record, I liked him better when you were him.” And he smiles that Yok smile, disarming and friendly, and White can’t help but smile a little as well, the tension leaving his body. “You should just come with us. He’ll get over it.”
Even now, there’s still a little voice in his head telling him he’s crazy, they’re doing dangerous things and he could get hurt or killed any minute. It’s what makes it too easy to want to heed Black’s warning, to simply sit back and wait for the others to do their thing. But in the end, the thrill of it all, the danger, and the knowledge that they’re doing something important, is what brings him back every time. “Yeah, let’s go.”
Lacking his own motorcycle now that his brother has taken back his life, White steps up to Black where he is securing his helmet, and picks up a spare. “I’ll ride with you.”
He’s met with a glare, but his spirits are up and he won’t be shut down again. He simply climbs onto the back of the bike and waits. “Don’t get in our way,” Black says.
“Shut up,” White says.
The engine roars to life, echoed by the others’ bikes. They don’t say anything else as they take to the road.
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